Jun 12, 2010

Creepy Date/ Words of Warning for When Dating

This weekend Tori and Alison went to Provo, Utah for a wedding reception. On Friday night Alison's friend Matthew invited us to go on a date with him and his roommates. Alison would go with Matthew and I would go with his roommate Brandon, and then there would be a third couple. This was my first blind date and pretty much my 3rd date of my life. Anyways so first off when we go to the boys apartment we were informed that Alison was now going to have to help drive (after we had just been in the car for 5 hours driving down there...something kinda sucky about this?YES!) not only that but they put us in different cars so that Alison and I were separated. My date was rather smooth at first, it was raining and he had an umbrella. He said that this way I had to stand close to him....Awkward because I had never met him before but still I give him props. Then in the car he kept putting his face incredibly close to mine and asking me if it made me uncomfortable all I could do was giggle and turn away (which is Tori language for YESSSS!!!!).
We started off by going ice skating, all of the boys escorted us in which is kinda cute, but this is only the beginning of the creepiest/weirdest date.
Part 1: " Ice Skating = Great excuse to hold on to a girl"
Within 5 min of being on the ice each of our dates had grabbed our hands. Can you say WEIRD! I know I've already pointed this out but I HAVE NEVER MET THIS KID!!!! By now Alison and I are doing are best to just get through this part of the date.
Part 2: "Alison just has to have her Moment"
During a lap around the rink I glance back to check on Al's and I see her fall on the ice, seeing this as the perfect excuse to get my hand away from his. So I rush across the ice to help her up and here's how the scene plays out....
Tori: Ali are you okay?
Al's: Hahaha yeah I'm fine
I reach down to help her up and when she stands she get's really pale....
Al's: Woah....I'm really dizzy
She grabs both of my arms and puts her head down to stop the room from spinning when BAM! She goes completely limp in my arms.(By now the whole date group is around us)
Tori: Alison? ALISON! Are you okay???HEY!!!! Wake up!!! ALI!!!
As everyone watched I carefully fell to my knees with Alison in my arms and gently laid her to the Ice. I tapped her face and she woke up.
Tori: Dude! You passed out are you ok.
Al's: Yeah I'm fine
She tries to stand when once again passes out in my arms and the date group is still just standing and watching as I laid her back on the ice. This time I can't get her to wake up and I'm starting to panic. After 15 seconds the guys are like, "Uhhhh, maybe we should go get help?"
YOU THINK! Finally Alison came too and a coach and a medic type man checked her out. Turns out she was just fine just a little dehydrated and stood up too fast.
Part 3: "Car rides should never be this Awkward."
When we left the Ice Rink my date decided that in the car he would sit unusually close to me and put his arm around me. I figured ok this is really weird but I'm not going to see this kid ever again, he's leaving on a mission and all night he had been putting his face super close to mine, maybe he's trying to see how far he can push me, or maybe I'm over reacting, I've never really been on a date maybe this is what happens...(WRONG!!!!!)
Part 4: "Almost Normal, wait what is he Doing"
Applebee's was the most normal part of the whole night. or so I thought. He didn't sit so close to me that we were touching, Alison and I were able to be next to each other so we could feel a little more comfortable, and we got to eat. Everthing was all good until all of a sudden something or better yet someone was rubbing my leg. Now I was freaked out and after a few seconds just kinda pulled my leg away and he stopped. NOW This is the part that I should have for sure said something but being the stupid innocent girl that I happen to be when it comes to guys I was scared and not really sure how to go about it.
Part 5: "OH NO! HOW DO WE GET OUT OF THIS!!!!!"
After Applebee's we went back to the guys apartment where the guys were very very cuddly. Now normally I'm all for cuddly, but I literally just met this kid and the ways he's cuddling is NOT okay. He not only was once again holding my hand but he had his other arm locked around me in a way that I really couldn't move.
I know that all you parents are like just SAY NO, and I've always told myself that I would NEVER let someone do this to me, but I froze and all I could think was "You have to get out of here." Alison's date now had his arm around her and was rubbing her arms. We gave each other the "Time to Go" look but no matter how much we tried it wasn't working. Brandon (my date) was now playing in my hair, smelling it, and whispering in my ear that I was hot. I was so uncomfortable I'm not even sure I was breathing. The whole time all I could think was "Why in the world are you not stopping him!!!!!"
Part 6: "FINALLY!"
After a long time of trying to leave we finally were set free. The boys trying to be "good dates" walked us back to the car. On the way of course Brandon wouldn't keep his hands off me, it was creepy and I just wanted to run to the car. When we got to the car he pulled me in and hugged me, I made it as short as possible. As I pulled away he tried to pull me in to KISS ME!!! Can you believe this Kid! This is where I finally got up the guts to STOP him, As he got closer I just pushed him away laughed and said goodnight. Alison's date tried to do the same to her. GROSS!!! As soon as we got in the car I couldn't stop shaking, I felt so violated, As soon as we were out of the parking lot I screamed my lungs out. This had been the most uncomfortable night of my life.
A WORD TO THE WISE ABOUT DATING:
NEVER, EVER let a guy(or girl) make you feel uncomfortable. If you are a guy taking a girl on a date you should always make her feel safe and be a PERFECT gentlemen.
GIRLS: Don't be afraid to say something to the guy if you don't feel safe, it's okay to say NO. Practice if you have too. I wish that I would have not have been so Stupid and I would have just told him off. Also when going on a blind date try to figure out a little about the person before so you can be better prepared.
PARENTS: For sure warn your kids to be picky about who they date, and tell them how to say NO.

I know that part of this is my fault, but NO ONE should have to deal with this on a date, especially a FIRST date.

3 comments:

  1. I'm so sorry that you had to go through this Tori. You are such a sweet heart. It's much harder than you think when you are in an uncomfortable situation like that. I don't know why it's so hard for us to "offend" someone who is offending us but it is. I like what you said about practicing. It's a great idea and then maybe you can help each other understand what to say and how to say it. Thank you for having the courage to share your story so the rest of us can have the courage to stand up for ourselves when we are faced with something similar.

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  2. Thanks, it was definitely one of the most uncomfortable moments of my life, I felt pretty violated. It messed me up for a while and my roommates have had to deal with my break downs, but they're so amazing and loving I don't know what I would do with out them. I just hate thinking that stuff like this happens everyday.

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  3. Tori Tori Tori!!! This makes me so mad. I'm sorry that happened. Yuck, what a loser!
    Girl, you gotta me more assertive and tell these bozos to back the heck off!!!! Don't be scared, k? I sure love you and am glad everything turned out ok.
    xoxoxo

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